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Monday, July 1, 2013

Lost in translation....RESET....Gratitude

I have been in a whirlwind since 2013 began! Off balance yes....thrown off course, yes... Confused, yes...frustrated, upset, angry, crying, remorseful, just out right pissed off at myself and the universe... Yes my DIvine.... I was angry at all things we deem sacred in the happenstances of life..... Truth be told, I still have my moments, but I am learning (presently) to just give in. Go with the flow....key word....FLOW. At the beginning of the year I never imagined that falling in love would send me to a place of pure sick pregnancy bliss, traveling through three states over the past four months, losing my car, masters program( for the second time), my house, independence....and yes for a while my sanity. Lost. Dark places creep upon us at the most inopportune moments.....everyday is a battle to stay afloat in a web of murky depressed waters that once drowned you before. Too familiar. But I refuse to go back there. So... Here I am at this place, this space of carrying new life... Surrounded by family, sheltered, resting in the small, quaint living quarters of my room....my toddler in the comfort of her grandmother, aunt and cousins....while I wrestle with reality and pray desperately for God to let me wake up and press the RESET button! But I am awakened.... Only to find gratitude in the midst of my turmoil. I give thanks. And suddenly the ideas be gain to flow, the writing is non stop, meditation comes easier...and I feel the life within me nudge me to a place of total surrender. My life is limitless.... And I am far from the end of living. So for now I will rest. Continue to write up these business plans....and give thanks for creativity.

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